Don’t let yourself die without knowing the wonder of fucking with love

Don’t be a critic. The critic is to art what the limp penis is to sex.

I do know that I don't want to wake him.We were up very late last night.

It's just not as hot without biting, scratching, and spanking, involved.

Sex without smiling is as sickly and as base as vodka and tonic without ice.

By 1975 sexual feeling and marriage will have nothing to do with each other.

Love is a banana. First you peel it, and then you roll on the condom.


She gave me money to buy condoms, and instead I bought a book of baby names.

We made love like two tree branches in winter. We were naked and motionless.

If it had been great sex I doubt I'd remember he tooted between thrusts.

You take a dick and you get it wet and then you put it someplace tight—

60% of children are born to unwed mothers. I should start pulling out.


The amount of perfume she had on was like a human sacrifice on Incense Night.

There’s nothing worse than being violently jerked away from creativity.

In everyday life do whatever I say. In the bedroom do whatever you'd like