Depend upon it, sir, when a man knows he is to be hanged in a fortnight, it concentrates his mind wonderfully.

It is a truth widely recognized that tyranny stems from the consent of the governed as much as democracy does.

The irony of life: Realizing a lifetime is barely long enough to figure out how it should’ve been lived.

I BELIEVE EVERYONE IS SPECIAL . . . BUT SOME PEOPLE THINK . . . . IT'S JUST ANOTHER WAY OF SAYING NO-ONE IS

The irony of sensory deprivation tanks is that in order to think outside the box, you must first go inside one.

He was the hardest person to figure out I had ever met, which was saying something. I knew girls, after all....

the weekly thirty minutes of sexual stress was a chronic but low-grade discomfort, like the humidity in Florida

The newly-minted captain is told to let nothing stop him but to do nothing that would risk his ship or his crew.

Irony of the day: arthritis medication with a cap that old people can't get off, because of their arthritis.

And yet sometimes we become the person we most dread. Or maybe we dread most the person we know we are to become.

And yet sometimes we become the person we most dread. Or maybe we dread most the person we know we are to become.

All depression has its roots in self-pity, and all self-pity is rooted in people taking themselves too seriously.

Irony has only emergency use. Carried over time it is the voice of the trapped who have come to enjoy their cage.

If she's really psychic," Zack said when he saw Tanisha's photo at school, "why does she need a doorbell?

Just to keep the bad dreams at bay, she took a swig out of a bottle that smelled of apples and happy brain-death.