To me, life without veal stock, pork fat, sausage, organ meat, demi-glace, or even stinky cheese is a life not worth living.

The vegan lifestyle is a compassionate way to live that supports life, supports fairness and equality, and promotes freedom.

All those other girls are cake...I'm Crème brûlée...Tiramisu, if you will. Just a few notches above.

Air freshener is man’s pitiful attempt to have his food smell as good, after digestion, as they did, before ingestion.

If God had created celery, it would only have two stalks, because that's the most that almost any recipe ever calls for.

Yes, ma’am, I will take seconds. Your dinner tastes like excrement. I scream, you scream, we all scream for excrement.

Just because your plate is empty, doesn’t mean your stomach is full. Same with love. Where’s the Romance Buffet?

We made love like I made breakfast—a breakfast for one. Still, when I eat alone is when I have the best conversations.

Sometimes writing is easy. Other times it’s as hard as trying to eat a whole whale, after the whale has just eaten you.

Malnutrition can be as common in poverty as in wealth, one for the lack of food, the other for the lack of knowledge of food.

I suppose there are people who can pass up free guacamole, but they're either allergic to avocado or too joyless to live.

This above all: to thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any man.

In geometry, whenever we had to find the area of a circle, pi * radius squared, I would get really hungry for pie. Square pie.

I like a cook who smiles out loud when he tastes his own work.Let God worry about your modesty; I want to see your enthusiasm.

My password is meatlover. My profile picture is a pizza. My love for you is real, like an invisible and inaudible mime parade.