I married Miss Right I just didn t know her first name was Always

I had nothing against women till I married one now I have nothing

I had some words with my wife and she had some paragraphs with me

Men in a singles bar have one thing in common they re all married

Wives are so much more attractive when they don t have an opinion

Husbands wish they had as much fun out as their wives think they do

Marriages are made in heaven But so again are thunder and lightning

A husband is a man who lost his liberty in the pursuit of happiness

I m the man of this house and I have my wife s permission to say so

I went alone on our honeymoon My wife had already seen Niagara Falls

A dress that zips up the back will bring a husband and wife togethe

My first rule of a happy marriage: It s better to be happy than right

Before you find your handsome prince you ve got to kiss a lot of frogs

The ideal husband is the one who understands what his wife did not say

An unmarried man has no buttons on his shirt A married man has no shirt