Humor is the affectionate communication of insight

Humor is just another defense against the universe

Humor is emotional chaos remembered in tranquility

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes

I know because I read. Might I suggest you try it?

Never cry over spilt milk It could ve been whiskey

Every survival kit should include a sense of humo

Humor is just another defense against the universe

I haven t read any of the autobiographies about me

If the facts don t fit the theory change the facts

I love money because my wife wants it all the time

I lie to myself all the time But I never believe me

There is never enough time unless you re serving it

Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse.

Monogamous musicians are like vegan hockey players.