A brick could be used to build a house—or destroy it, one window at a time.


Expired condoms are like nuclear waste: there's nothing sensible you can do with it.

A blanket could be used to cover up my modesty. And used to cover up my nakedness.


The more passionate and argumentative I get the more followers and friends I make online.

A blanket is a coffin, if the cops are after you and you have to dump a body quick.


I, myself, love complications and mystery which I didn't notice that I had become one.

A blanket could be used as a smothering agent, sort of like an employee of the NSA.


At this point I think we need to embrace the weird. High-five it. Give it our phone number.

If you’re going to hold a grudge, at least put on an oven mitt before you pick it up.

Just as heart is a fountain of unspoken words the universe is a womb of wonder weird worlds

A blanket could be frozen and used to cool off a warm body as you slowly thaw it out.


A brick could be cast in Samuel Jackson roles. It would be cheaper and more dramatic.


A brick could be a breath freshener for a dragon. But so could a mint-flavored baby. 


Just as heart is a fountain of unspoken words,the universe is a womb of wonder weird worlds.

A blanket could be used as a cover of your favorite song by your favorite cover band.