Make the little things count Teach midgets math
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Don t pee in my pool I wont swim in your toilet
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The only thing lazy people do fast is get tired
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I always lie In fact I m lying to you right now
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I m currently fasting to protest hunger strikes
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I heard that the idea for the patent was stolen
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Do crematoriums give discounts to burn victims?
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Do gun manuals have a trouble-shooting section?
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When I gave her the ring she gave me the finge
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Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition
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Fools rush in wherever lottery tickets are sold
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Why fart and waste when you can burp and taste?
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Lips that touch liquor touch other lips quicke
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I used to be addicted to soap But I m clean now
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It is easier to get forgiveness than permission
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