We sat on the floor for dinner. Ananya's father passed me a banana leaf. I wondered if i had to eat it or wipe my hands with it.

Humor is a serious thing I like to think of it as one of our greatest earliest natural resources which must be preserved at all cost

When I was a kid I had a friend who worked in a radio station Whenever we walked under a bridge you couldn t understand what he said

I threw an etiquette party and served nothing but beans and sparkling water. The topic of conversation was ‘excuse me’.

A brick could be dropped on your mother-in-law’s head from the height of 66.6 feet. You know, as a going away present. 


I just started working the graveyard shift at the cemetery. Come to think of it, every shift at the cemetery is the graveyard shift.

Crystal ball and candle light, I want your dance tonight. Show me the power of love as we stand together in the middle of the night.

I had a dream about you last night... you were crying over spilt ink screaming "the words, the what could have been beautiful words.

Humor is a serious thing I like to think of it as one of our greatest earliest natural resources which must be preserved at all cost

Curling is not a sport I called my grandmother and told her she could win a gold medal because they have dusting in the Olympics now

..As always, she was carrying the washing. Rudy was carrying two buckets of cold water, or as he put it, two buckets of future ice.

I had to quit my taxi cab driving job because I had no way to get to work. The problem was I kept calling myself to come pick me up.

This is Simba," Nicole said, pointing to the lion. "Is he dangerous?" Asked Chase."Not really. He mauled a trainer, but nothing much.

Falling in love is like falling into the arms of a starving cannibal. It’s the only time when dinner for two is dinner for one.

the table of elements does not contain one of the most powerful elements that make up our world, and that is the element of surprise.