A man can sleep around, no questions asked, but if a woman makes nineteen or twenty mistakes she's a tramp.

It doesn’t matter what you’ve got in your pants if there is nothing in your brain to connect it to.

When I told people I’d reinvent the orgasm, people moaned in disbelief. Well, nobody’s moaning now.

Sex between a man and a woman can be wonderful, provided you can get between the right man and the right woman.

It doesn’t matter what you’ve got in your pants if there is nothing in your brain to connect it to.

It doesn’t matter what you’ve got in your pants if there is nothing in your brain to connect it to.

I can take care of myself,” I said hotly.“Darlin, you don't even know how to pleasure yourself.

My heart and my cock seemed to like the idea, and Whitney made me a slave to both, so my wits were outnumbered.

The only thing we don't have a god for is premature ejaculation... but I hear that it's coming quickly.

I don’t think Garbo with her clothes off, panting in a brass bed, would have been more sexy than she was.

I used to want to be a missionary, but I don’t believe that’d be the best position for me to be in.

I peel cats like I pet oranges. And I often snuggle with watermelons, sometimes with the intent of making love.

I hung a picture of him above my bed and learned by hand the internal workings of the female combustion engine.

—Hazme lo que quieras —susurró. Tenía diecisiete años y la vida en los labios.

I had a dream I took the form of Chuck Norris and kicked your ass. Then I impregnated you from across the room.