Underwater nobody can dance. Let this be a lesson in basket weaving. And love.

I’ll write The Art Of Love, which will be tactical, like The Art Of War.

I farted like a pack of crying onions. That was my response to her I love you.

Love is a wonderful thing, my dear, but it leaves you wide open for blackmail.

I have never seduced a fish taco for selfish reasons. I am an altruistic lover.

Love dances in my heart like a nudist in socks. Boy, that jig is awfully jiggly.

Nothing is too wonderful to be true if it be consistent with the laws of nature.

In the meantime, it is best to grab what wonderful moments you find lying around.

A bear trap eats, but does not drink. My love, however, drinks, but does not eat.

Love is the only gift that’s acceptable to give away as soon as you get it.

To their eyes, I was love. To their ears, I was truth. To their noses, I was anus.

When you are isolated and obscured, your achievements may be wonderful but unknown.

We made love sweet and gentle, like strawberry jelly. Peanut butter makes me horny.

If you fill your mind with wonderful thoughts, there can be no room left for doubt.

Per una mente ben organizzata la morte non é che una nuova, grande avventura