If we re not supposed to have midnight snacks why is there a light in the fridge?

When you feel like criticizing the younger generation just remember who raised them

It is probably better to be insane with the rest of the world than to be sane alone

If people from Poland are called Poles why are nt people from Holland called Holes?

Why do people say you ve been working like a dog when dogs just sit around all day?

A lot of good could be accomplished in this world if nobody cared who got the credit

I couldn t quite remember how to throw a boomerang but eventually it came back to me

You don t stop laughing because you grow old you grow old because you stopped laughing

Good judgement comes from experience; and experience well that comes from bad judgement

Your problem is never really your problem your reaction to your problem is your problem

If you think your boss is stupid remember: you wouldn t have a job if he was any smarte

I believe no problem is so large or so difficult that it can t be blamed on somebody else

Never tell your problems to anyone 20% don t care and the other 80% are glad you have them

Humans are like tea bags They never realize their strength until they are put in hot wate

If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times does he become disoriented?