Myrnin was silent for a beat, and then he said, "Bob would be very disappointed in you.

He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamposts: for support rather than illumination

I’m not opposed to new people, I just don’t like their packaging (diapers).

...you don't care because you're all that and I'm just an artery in a dress.

First blood is mine.Last blood counts for more.--Artemis Entreri and Drizzt Do'Urden

Sometimes in the quest for enlightenment the only thing that gets lighter is your wallet

I'm English. We're about as tactful as a hot poker up the bum, most of the time.

To be unpopular, you must look the part. Remember four words: plastic flowered swim cap.

Revel in grossness. Leave food in your teeth. Proudly display feminine hygiene products.

Oh! That was poetry!" said Pippin. "Do you really mean to start before the break of day?

Like a welcome summer rain humor may suddenly cleanse and cool the earth the air and you

Humor brings insight and tolerance Irony brings a deeper and less friendly understanding

Always end the name of your child with a vowel so that when you yell the name will carry

A good story should provoke discussion, debate, argument...and the occasional bar fight.

Since I had a soft spot for zombies and my curiosity was killing me, I opted for plan Z.