You think that killing people will make them like you more, but it doesn't,it just makes them dead.

I came from a real tough neighborhood. Why, every time I shut the window I hurt somebody's fingers.

I killed him, but that doesn’t mean I enjoyed every second of every month of the torture process.

Never let go of a good thing without a fight. Especially if that good thing is a pair of boxing gloves.

I want a billion people to know my name as well as they know their own. I want to clone myself to fame.

No guest rooms.” I shake my head resolutely. “I want to be in a room room. A lived-in room.

I had a dream about you last night... you made a beard for yourself out of forty two bags of Twizzlers.

The only activity a cynic will find contagious is yawning, that is, with other people, at other people.

She already had a headache-she didn't want to add 'get tortured' to today's to-do list.

You need power only when you want to do something harmful Otherwise A smile is Enough to get everything

You can fool all of the people all of the time if the advertising is right and the budget is big enough

I want the US government to dispense with all the “red tape,” and start using Caution tape.

A person without a sese of humor is like a wagon without springs It s jolted by every pebble on the road

Satan impregnated my mother one lovely spring morning. We didn’t have the heart to tell my father.

If love were a variety of dog, I’d want mine hot. I’d take my love with ketchup and mustard.