I am the dinosaur of love. Specifically, I am a pterodactyl, and you are my silent “p.” Stay quiet woman!

Divorce runs high these days, but I’m an exception to the norm. I got divorced when marriage was still popular.

A stack of graham crackers represents me as a person: am I a cookie or a cracker? Neither. Both. I’m a crackie.

If we spoke with our ears, and listened through our mouth, then a kiss might be the most romantic sound in the world.

I was one of those. I meddled with dark powers. Isummoned demons. I ate the entire little cheese, including the rind.

Love is a four-letter word. So is glue, only it isn’t as sticky. And I must admit, I still eat it all the time.

Why can t men stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck?

If you have wit use it to please and not to hurt: you may shine like the sun in the temperate zones without scorching

If you have the woman you love what more do you need? Well besides an alibi for the time of her husband s murder 8232;

Charlie Chaplin s genius was in comedy He had no sense of humour particularly about himself Charlie Chaplin s ex-wife

Pull the hair on my head the wrong way, and I would be on my knees begging for mercy. I have very sensitive follicles.

Are you going to answer my questions, or do I have to whack you with a stick until delicious candy surprises fall out?

I want to be a creature that’s half bee, half the letter B. That way I can pollinate the world with my literacy.

When Eve ate the apple her knowledge increased. But God liked dumb women so Paradise ceased. Gwen Goodnight. Her Work.

Divination is turning out to be much more trouble than I could have foreseen, never having studied the subject myself.