WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing with you
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing with you
Intelligence is like underwear everyone should have it but we shouldn t show it off
If you keep your feet firmly on the ground you ll have trouble putting on your pants
If you always do what you ve always done you ll always get what you ve always gotten
All of the animals except man know that the principal business of life is to enjoy it
People cannot go wrong if you don t let them They cannot go right unless you let them
If you believe that dreams can come true be prepared for the occasional nightmare too
Remember a sense of humor does not mean that you tell him jokes it means you laugh at his
Why is it that when someone says they are no speech maker they have to go on to prove it?
Do not argue with an idiot He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience
Advice is like medicine - the correct dosage works wonders but an overdose can be dangerous
An optimist thinks that this is the best possible world A pessimist fears that this is true
If you ve a 50-50 chance of getting something right there s a 90% chance you ll get it wrong
The time to stop talking is when the other person nods his head affirmatively but says nothing
It s not a shortage of judges that causes the problems in our courts; it s the excess of lawyers