Recording - Hello Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline If you are obsessive-compulsive please press 1 repeatedly If you are co-dependent please ask someone to press 2 If you have multiple personalities please press 3 4 5 and 6 If you are paranoid-delusional we know who you are and what you want Just stay on the line until we can trace the call If you are schizophrenic listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press If you are manic-depressive it doesn t matter which number you press No one will answe
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