A drunk was hauled into court Mister the judge began You ve been brought here for drinking Great the drunk exclaimed When do we get started?

BOSS Gun le ke Gusse me Office aaya Or chillaya:-
Kis kaminey ne Meri WiFe ko kiss kiya jaan se mar dunga
Peeche Se Pappu Bola:- Goliyan kam pad jayengi si

I happened to be in Stockholm on a business trip last month and was dining in a restaurant Before ordering my dinner I asked for a whisky Which is the best Swedish whisky? I asked the waiter Sir are you from India? he asked Yes Then you must try our very special brand Bofors it gives you instant kickbacks

One day Lord shiva decided to visit the earth and try some alcohol So he changed his get-up and went to a bar in Chandigarh and asked the bartender What all do you have Bartender We have whiskey rum vodka gin beer Lord Shiva Let s try whiskey first give me five bottles of whiskey After having five bottles of whiskey Lord shiva decided to try Rum Bartender was shocked Who is this man after having five bottles of whisky and he is still on his feet After having five bottles of Rum Shiva decided to have beer After having fourty bottles of beer he asked the bartender for Gin Bartender couldn t stop himself asking him Sir who are you?? I ve seen people getting drunk after having four glasses of whiseky and you ve almost had fifty bottles and you are still on your feet who are you??? Lord Shiva Vats Hum Bhagwaan Shiv hain Bartender AB CHADHI ISKO

The angry wife met her husband at the door There was alcohol on his breath and lipstick on his collar I assume she snarled that there is a very good reason for you to come waltzing in here at six o clock in the morning? There is he replied Breakfast

If you bought 1000 worth of Nortel stock one year ago it would now be worth 72 If you bought 1000 worth of Budweiser (the beer not the stock) one year ago drank all the beer and traded in the cans for the 5-cent deposit you would have 79 My advice is to start drinking heavily

Shhaaayyy buddy what s a Breathalyzer? asked one drink to his friend at the next barstool Well I d have to say it s a bag that tells you when you ve drunk way too much answered the equally wasted gent Ah hell whaddya know? I ve been married to one of those for years and years now

It was the morning after and he sat groaning and holding his head Well if you hadn`t drunk so much last night you wouldn`t feel so bad now the wife said tartly My drinking had nothing to do with it he answered I went to bed feeling wonderful and woke up feeling awful It was the sleep that did it

Tom and Brad have been promoted from privates to sergeants Not long after they`re out for a walk and Tom says Hey Brad there`s the Officer`s Club Let`s you and me stop in But we`re privates protests Brad We`re sergeants now says Tom pulling him inside Now Brad I`m gonna sit down and have me a drink

A guy walks in a bar and buys a huge beer Then he sees someone he knows and decides to go and say hi to them but he does not want to drag his beer mug with him So he sets it on a table along with a note I spit in this beer hoping that none will steal it then Upon return he sees another note saying Me too

There was a husband and his wife sitting next to a drunk in a bar Suddenly the drunk stands up and yells ATTENTION ALL and farts loudly The wife is extremely embarrassed and the husband looks at the drunk and says Excuse me you just farted before my wife The drunks replies I m sorry I didn t know it was her turn

There was a husband and his wife sitting next to a drunk in a bar Suddenly the drunk stands up and yells ATTENTION ALL and farts loudly The wife is extremely embarrassed and the husband looks at the drunk and says Excuse me you just farted before my wife The drunks replies I m sorry I didn t know it was her turn

There was a husband and his wife sitting next to a drunk in a bar Suddenly the drunk stands up and yells ATTENTION ALL and farts loudly The wife is extremely embarrassed and the husband looks at the drunk and says Excuse me you just farted before my wife The drunks replies I m sorry I didn t know it was her turn

There was a husband and his wife sitting next to a drunk in a bar Suddenly the drunk stands up and yells ATTENTION ALL and farts loudly The wife is extremely embarrassed and the husband looks at the drunk and says Excuse me you just farted in front of my wife The drunks replies I m sorry I didn t know it was her turn

A guy rushes into a bar orders four expensive thirty-year- old single malts and has the bartender line them up in front of him Then without pausing he downs each one Whew the bartender remarks you seem to be in a hurry You would be too if you had what I have What do you have? the bartender sympathetically asks Fifty cents