A motorist driving by a Texas ranch hit and killed a calf that was crossing the road The driver went to the owner of the calf and explained what had happened He then asked what the animal was worth Oh about 200 today said the rancher But in six years it would have been worth 900 So 900 is what I m out The motorist sat down and wrote out a check and handed it to the farme
A Pole an Italian and a Jew all first-time fathers-to-be are pacing nervously in the Maternity Ward waiting room when a nurse rushes out of the delivery room holding a black baby Is it yours? she asks the Italian Certainly not he retorts Yours? she asks the Pole who vigorously denies paternity How about you? she asks the Jew Maybe he says glumly My wife burns everything
John was talking to his fiancée Rebecca and he said Be honest now baby How am I as a lover? To which she replied Honey I would definitely say that you re warm Really? he said excitedly Yes in fact I would say that you re the dictionary definition of the word warm John was pleased until he went home and just for fun checked his dictionary and found WARM: Not so hot
A census taker walked up to a woman who was sitting on a porch After introducing himself he said How many children do you have? The woman answered Four The census taker asked May I have their names please? The woman replied Eenie Meenie Minie and George Confused the census taker said May I ask why you named your fourth child George ? Surely because we didn t want any Moe
A guy walked up to a beautiful young woman in a bar Do you mind if I ask you a personal question? he said to her I don t know replied the beautiful young woman It depends how personal it is OK the guy said How many men have you slept with? I m not going to tell you that the woman exclaimed That s my business Sorry said the guy I didn t realize you made a living out of it
A boy s status on FB: Bye Bye Mexico Girl 1 comments: Wow When did you go to Mexico? Girl 2 comments: Yesterday you were in Spain Girl 3 comments: So touring all Spanish speaking countries Boy: Girls Spain and Mexico have been eliminated from the World Cup Girl 4: Don t make me a fool I Know Spain and Mexico were never part of the World Cup Even we follow a bit of Cricket
The story about the pilot ground school got me thinking about my first skydiving instructor During class he would take time to answer any of our stupid First Timer Questions One guy asked: If our parachute doesn`t open and the reserve doesn`t open how long do we have till we hit the ground? Our jump master looked at him and in perfect deadpan answered: The rest of your life
A man who makes coffin was on his way to deliver one of his coffins when his car broke down Trying not to be late he put the coffin on his head and began heading to his destination Some policemen saw him wanted to make some money off him so they challenged him Hey what are you carrying and where are you going? The man said I do not like where I was buried so I am relocating
काले धन को छोड़ो ये सोचो
प्रधानमंत्री को विदेश से कैसे लाया जाये
A man is sitting next to a woman who s trying to breast-feed her baby in a bus The baby refuses to suck the breast the mother warns If you don t suck I shall give it to the uncle next to me The baby still refuses After about 20 minutes the woman repeats the threat The man clears his throat and says Look madam you better make up your mind I was suppose to get Off six bus-stops ago
I was on vacation playing the slot machines It was my first time in a casino and I wasn`t sure how the machines operated Excuse me I said to a casino employee How does this work? he worker showed me how to insert a bill hit the spin button and operate the release handle And where does the money come out? I asked He smiled and motioned to a far wall before saying Usually at the ATM
बीकानेर में गर्मी में घूमने लायक ठंडी जगहें
Hdfc Bank
Icici bank
Axis Bank
Idbi Bank
Yes Bank
& ATM
On his first visit to a girl s house a guy waited in the living room while she prepared a snack in the kitchen Left alone he noticed a small attractive vase on the mantelpiece He picked it up and was looking at it when the girl walked back in What s this? he asked Oh my father s ashes are in there she said Oh I m so sorry Yeah he s too lazy to go to the kitchen and get an ashtray
Think you are sitting in front of computer what computer will think ?? Do you know ?? Intel inside mental outside Wait don t laugh joke is not over You are standing in front of fridge What fridge will think Do you know ?? Cool inside fool outside Wait one more for you Think you are standing outside race course What race course will think Do you know ?? Ghoda inside Gadha outside
The car sped off the highway went through the guard rail rolled down a cliff bounced off a tree and finally shuddered to a stop A passing motorist who had witnessed the entire accident helped the miraculously unharmed driver out of the wreck Good lord mister he gasped Are you drunk? Of course said the man brushing the dirt from his suit What the hell do you think I am a stunt driver?
