Me:The world can`t end in 2016. Someone:Really?Why? Me:My snack bar doesn`t expire until 2016!

eally doesn`t get why people like brunch. What`s the benefit of combining break-dancing and lunch?

Dear food commercials, No one eats in slow motion with their eyes closed. Sincerely, normal people..

Everything sucks...............................................except FOOD !!!! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Just finished my 6 minute upper body workout-it was pretty easy:arm down,pick up food,arm up,put food in mouth, switch arms :)

Okay, can someone please invent the opposite of a microwave. I need my beer cold, now. And no, the freezer is not fast enough :)

When you`re stressed you eat ice cream, cake, chocolate, and sweets.. Why? Because `Stressed` spelled backwards is `Desserts` :)

The awkward moment when you`re eating dinner at someone else`s house & you don`t like the food, but you have to pretend to like it.

There was a piece of chocolate cake in the fridge and a note, “Don’t eat me.” Now there’s an empty plate and a note, Don’t tell me what to do.