I don’t go looking for trouble. Trouble usually finds me.

I cannot tell you how grateful I am, I am filled with humidity.

The strawberry shampoo doesn’t taste as good as it smells.

Its crazy how much you let someone hurt you without realizing it.

The stuff you heard about me is a lie, I’m way worse…

Being someones FIRST may be great but being LAST is perfect…

Seeing a spider is nothing. It becomes a problem when it disappears.

The two most common elements in the world are hydrogen and stupidity.

Hee Hee Hee Hee Hee, you can’t stop me! I broke my off switch..

If Harry Potter is so magical then why can’t he fix his eye sight?

If you were a tear in my eyes, I would not cry for the fear of losing you.

If you stop telling lies about me, I’ll stop telling the truth about you.

You must be a certified helmet wearing window licker to ride the sunshine bus..

If you want to read about love and marriage, you have to buy two separate books.

When I get a text from you, I immediately stop whatever I’m doing to read it.