A man appeared before St Peter at the pearly gates Have you ever done anything of particular merit? St Peter asked Well I can think of one thing the man offered Once on a trip to the Black Hills out in South Dakota I came upon a gang of high-testosterone bikers who were threatening a young woman I directed them to leave her alone but they wouldn t listen So I approached the largest and most heavily tattooed biker and smacked him on the head kicked his bike over ripped out his nose ring and threw it on the ground I yelled Now back off biker boy or you ll answer to me St Peter was impressed When did this happen? Just a couple minutes ago

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