Santa and Banta were discussing how they would like to die Santa said When I die I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did in his sleep I dont want to die screaming like some of his friends who also died at the same time Banta asked How did his friends die screaming while your grandfather died sleeping peacefully? Santa replied His friends were the passengers in the car he was driving
Santa and Banta were in a bank when armed robbers burst in While several of the robbers take the money from the tellers others line the customers including Santa ands Banta up against a wall and proceed to take their wallets watches etc While this is going on Santa jams something in Banta`s hand Without looking down Banta whispers What is this? To which Santa replies It`s that Rs 500 I owe you
An Englishman an American and Santa are called upon to test a lie detector The Englishman says: I think I can empty 20 bottles of beer BUZZZZZZ goes the lie detector Ok he says 10 bottles And the machine is silent The American says: I think I can eat 15 hamburgers BUZZZZZZ goes the lie detector Allright 8 hamburgers And the machine is silent The Santa says: I think BUZZZZZZ goes the machine
Santa`s wife was in hospital to deliver a child had fixed a code with the nurse on duty so that she could send him a message in the office telling him the child`s gender If it was a boy she would say he had passed If a girl she would say he had failed In due course the Santa`s boss called him and said `There was a phone call for you from some agitated lady She said that you got a compartment `
Santa got a job in a supermarket and one day a man came in and wanted to buy half a grapefruit I don`t think we can sell half a grapefruit said Santa but I`ll ask my boss He walked over to the boss and said Some idiot wants to buy half a grapefruit then noticed that the man had followed him over and heard the comment And this fine gentleman Santa added “would like to buy the other half
Santa and Banta were in a restaurant and ordered fish The waiter brought a dish with two fish one larger than the other Santa said to Banta Please help yourself Banta said Okay and helped himself to the larger fish After a tense silence Santa said really now if you had offered me the first choice I would have taken the smaller fish Banta replied What are you complaining for; you have it don t you?
Major Banta needed to use a pay phone but didn`t have change for Rs 10/- note He saw Soldier Santa mopping the base`s corridor floors and asked him `Santar do you have change for Rs 10/-?` Soldier Santa replied `Sure ` The Major Banta turned red He said `That`s no way to address a superior officer Now let`s try it again Soldier do you have change for a Rs 10/- note?` Soldier Santa replied `No SIR `
It was a really hot day at the office There were about twenty people in close quarters and everyone was sweating even with a fan on All of a sudden people started to wrinkle their noses at an odor passing through the air It was the most hideous smell anyone had ever smelt One man said Uh oh someone s deodorant isn t working Santa from the distant corner replied It can t be me I m not wearing any
A bald man took a seat in a beauty shop `How can I help you?` asked the stylist `Listen lady I`m a rich man but I haven`t been able to solve my balding problem ` the guy explained `I went for a hair transplant but I couldn`t stand the pain If you can make my hair look like yours without causing me any discomfort I`ll pay you Rs 1 00 000 ` `No problem ` said the stylist and she quickly shaved her head
Santa: Whom you like more mama or papa? Pappu: Both Santa: No tell me one ?? Pappu: Both Santa: If I go to America your mother goes to Paris where will you go?? Pappu: Paris Santa: It means you like your mother?? Pappu: No because Paris is beautiful than America Santa: If I go to Paris your mother goes to America so where will you go?? Pappu: America Santa: Why? Pappu: Paris toh ghoom aaye na papa
Santa stormed up to the front desk of the library and said I have a complaint Yes Sir ? said the librarian looking up at him I borrowed a book last week and it was horrible Puzzled by his complain the librarian asked What was wrong with it? It had way too many characters and there was no plot whatsoever said Santa The librarian nodded and said Ahhh So you must be the person who took our phone book
Banta noticed that Santa was looking depressed and asked what was wrong Well said Santa I ran afoul of one of those awkward questions women ask Now I m in deep trouble at home What kind of question? asked Banta My wife asked me if I would still love her when she gets old fat and wrinkly That s easy said Banta You just say Of course I will Yeah said Santa That s what I did except I said Of course I DO
Santa noticed that Banta was looking depressed and asked what was wrong Well said Banta I ran afoul of one of those awkward questions women ask Now I m in deep trouble at home What kind of question? asked Santa My wife asked me if I would still love her when she gets old fat and wrinkly That s easy said Santa You just say Of course I will Yeah said Banta That s what I did except I said Of course I DO
Two weeks after Santa is transfer into the promotion department his old boss got a phone call You told me Santa was a responsible worker yelled the furious head of promotion Oh he is she confirmed In the year he worked in my department the computer went down five times and had to be completely reprogrammed the petty cash got misplaced six times and I developed an ulcer And each time Santa was responsible
When Santa came home his wife Jeeto was crying Your mother insulted me Jeeto sobbed My mother? How could she do that when she is on vacation on the other side of the country? Santa asked I know But this morning a letter addressed to you arrived I opened it because I was curious And? At the end of the letter it said Dear Jeeto when you have finished reading this letter don t forget to give it to my son
