George receives a phone call Hello he answers The voice on the other end says This is Jessica We met at a party about 3 months ago George hmmm Jessica? You say we met 3 months ago? Jessica Yes it was at Adam s house After the party gave me a ride home On the way home we parked and got into the back seat You told me I was a good sport George Oh yeah Susan How are have you been? Jessica Well I m pregnant and I m going to kill myself George Say you really ARE a good sport
A couple of redneck hunters were out in the woods when one of them fell to the ground He didn t seem to be breathing His eyes were rolled back in his head The other guy whipped out his mobile phone and called the emergency services He gasped to the operator My friend is dead What can I do? The operator in a calm soothing voice said Just take it easy First let s make sure he s dead There was silence then a gun shot The guy s voice came back on the line He said Okay now what?
Tom had this problem of getting up late in the morning and was always late for work His boss was mad at him and threatened to fire him if he didn`t do something about it So Tom went to his doctor who gave him a pill and told him to take it before he went to bed Tom slept well and in fact beat the alarm in the morning He had a leisurely breakfast and drove cheerfully to work Boss he said The pill actually worked That`s all fine ” said the boss But where were you yesterday?
It was a really hot day at the office due to a malfunction with the air conditioning system There were about twenty people in close quarters and everyone was sweating even with a fan on All of a sudden people started to wrinkle their noses at an odor passing through the air It was the most hideous smell anyone had ever smelled One man popping his head out of his cubicle said Oh man Someone s deodorant isn t working A man in the corner replied It can t be me I m not wearing any
A couple of hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground He doesn t seem to be breathing his eyes are rolled back in his head The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services He gasps to the operator My friend is dead What can I do? The operator in a calm soothing voice says Just take it easy I can help First let s make sure he s dead There is a silence then a shot is heard The guy s voice comes back on the line He says OK now what?
Texas A M Study Calls Obama 5th Best President From a total of 44 US Presidents Obama is rated the 5th best The A M s Public Relations Office released this statement: After only 6 years in office Americans have rated President Obama the 5th best President ever These are the details according to Texas A M: 1 Reagan Lincoln tied for first 2 Twenty three presidents tied for second 3 Seventeen other presidents tied for third 4 Jimmy Carter came in fourth and 5 Obama came in fifth
A couple of hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground He doesn t seem to be breathing his eyes are rolled back in his head The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services He gasps to the operator My friend is dead What can I do? The operator in a calm soothing voice says Just take it easy I can help First let s make sure he s dead There is a silence then a shot is heard The guy s voice comes back on the line He says OK now what?
सास ने जमाई को फोन किया भूकंप के क्या समाचार है
जमाई - खाना बना रही है बात करवाऊ क्या
A woman is watching the news on TV and they are reporting live from a helicopter about a man driving down the highway going the wrong way All the other cars are swerving all over the place trying to avoid hitting this guy She calls her husband to warn him as he knows that he travels on that highway at this time She says to him There s this crazy driver on the highway going the wrong direction He replies emphatically Just one hell there s a whole bunch of them going the wrong way
A soldier serving overseas and far from home was very bitter and terribly upset when his girl wrote that she was breaking off their engagement and wanted her photograph back Being a sort of creative fellow he went out and collected all the unwanted photographs that he could find from his buddies bundled them all together and sent them to her with a note stating the following: Dear Mary Regret cannot remember which one of these is of you please keep your photo and return the others
A man sees another leaning against the wall of a large building The second man is puffing away one cigarette after another The nonsmoker says Sir I couldn`t help noticing how you chain smoke How many packs do you smoke a day? Four How long have you been smoking? Thirty years That`s over six thousand packs If you didn`t smoke you could have saved enough money to buy this building The smoker takes a deep puff and says Do you smoke? Never Do you own this building? No Well I do
If you are in Love: - Make the best of it - Don t doubt anythng - Enjoy it because nothing lasts forever If you just Broke up: - Don t cry Remembr that you had a good time - Neverstay alone Your friends are there - Hug more people - Stop listening to sad music It only make things worse If you are Single: - Stay happy - Hang out with friends family - Try looking for someone who you think is the best for you If you are Married: -Game over Just delete this msg get back to work
Two campers are hiking in the woods when one is bitten on the rear end by a rattlesnake I ll go into town for a doctor the other says He runs ten miles to a small town and finds the town s only doctor who is delivering a baby I can t leave the doctor says But here s what to do Take a knife cut a little x where the bite is suck out the poison and spit it on the ground The guy ruins back to his friend who is in agony What did the doctor say? the victim asks He says you re gonna die
During their first date the guy goes to the girl s house and she shows him into the living room She excuses herself to go to get them a drink and as he s standing there alone he notices a cute little vase on the mantel He picks it up and as he s looking at it she walks back in with the drinks Holding up the vase he asks What s this? She says Oh my father s ashes are in there He goes Oooh I I didn t know your father She says Yeah he s too lazy to go to the kitchen to get an ashtray
A very attractive young lady was sitting in a fine restaurant one night Waiting for her date as she was she wanted to make sure everything was perfect So as she bends down in her chair to get the mirror from her purse she accidentally farts quite loudly just as the waiter walks up Sitting up straight now embarrassed and red faced knowing everyone in the place heard her turns to the waiter and demands Stop That The waiter looks at her dryly and says Sure lady which way was it headed?
