Banta Ek Job Ke Liye Interview Dene Gaya Vaise Naukri Already Boss Ke Saale Ko Mil Chuki Thee Par Formality Ke Liye Interview Jaroori Tha Isliye Aise Sawaal Pucche Ja Rahe The Jinka Kol Matlab Nahin Tha Apne Banta Ko Bulaya Gaya Interview Ke Liye Interviewer: Aap Nadi Ke Beech Mein Ek Boat Par Ho Aur Apke Paas 2 Cigarettes Ke Alawa Kuch Bhi Nahin Hai Apko Ek Cigarette Jalana Hai Kaise Jalaoge ??? Banta: Sir Iske 3-4 Solutions Ho Sakte Hain Interviewer Shocked Lekin Kahaan: Achcha Theek Hai Batao Banta Ke Out Of The World Answers: Take One Cigarette and Throw it in the Water So the boat will become LIGHTER using this LIGHTER you can light the other Cigarette Interviewer: Kya Bakwas Hai Banta s Another solution: You throw a cigarette up and catch it Catches win Matches Using the matches that you win you can light the cigarette Interviewer: Stupid Banta: Sir one more Solution: Take water in your hand and drop it drop by drop (TIP TIP TIP ) Interviewer: Abey Bewakoof Us Se Kya Hoga??? Banta: Sir Aapne Wo Gaana Nahin Suna TIP TIP Barsa Pani Pani Ne Aag Lagayee Us Aag Se Humne Cigarette Jalayee Banta: Sir If that was not enough I have one more solution: Start praising one cigarette the other will get jealous and Jalney Lagega Interviewer Impressed Saale Ko Maaro Goli Naukri Banta Ko Hee De Dete Hain

22 EPIC things only Indian parents say Read this 1 Paise Ped Pe Nahi Ugte Hain 2 Me: Mom Can I go out for a late night party? Mom: Ask Dad Dad: Ask Mom 3 If you don t reach home by 8 pm then there s no need to come back 4 If you don t study and make a career you will become like him *points to a homeless man 5 Bete abhi padh lo baad mein aish hi aish hai 6 Wait till you have Kids of You re own 7 Isse Boarding school bhejenge tabhi sudherega 8 Uncle Aunty ke Pair Chuo Beta Aashirwaad Lo 9 Kid: Mummy mere maths mein 90 aaye out of 100 Mom: Class mein Highest marks kitney hain? 10 Go and study Ye dost nahi aane vale tere exams dene 11 Tumko hi sab pata hai humne toh duniya dekhi hi nahi hai na 12 Humari baat sun na kabse shuru karoge? 13 Kahaan hai laad sahab ye koi time hai ghar aane ka ? 14 Ghus ja TV ke Andar man of the match toh tujhe he milne wala hai 15 Aunty ko thank you bolo bolo Thank you aunty bolo 16 Humare Time mein aise nahi hota tha 17 Jab khud kamaoge toh pata chalega kitna mushkil hai kamana 18 Kya tumhare dost bhi apne maa-baap se isi tarah baat karte hain? 19 Mein ek hi baat mein baar baar nahi bolungi You re getting up or no? I m asking youu one last time 20 Beta uncle ko woh dance kar ke dikhao chalo dance kar ke dikhao Haha ab nahi kar raha sharmila hai thoda 21 Iske Par nikal aaye hain 22 Dopahar mein bhi light kyu jalate ho?

Aamir: Smiling Teacher: Aap muskura kyon rahe ho? Aamir: Bahut dino se FB page ka admin banne ki ichcha thi aaj ban gaya hun bahut maza aa raha hai Teacher: Jyada maze lene ki zarurat nahi hai Ok tell me what is a post? Aamir: Anything that is posted on facebook is a post sir Teacher: Can you please elaborate? Aamir: Sir jo bhi facebook pe log daalte hain wo post hai sir ghumne gaye uski photo daal diya Post hai sir Sir actually hum post se ghire hue hain Katrina ki pic se Ronaldo ki kick tak Sab post hai sir Ek second mein comment ek second mein like Comment-Like Comment-like Teacher: Shut up ADMIN banke ye karoge??? Comment-like comment-like Chatur tum batao? Chatur: Pictures texts or Videos posted through Mobile or Tablet or laptop or desktop via different operating system using internet on facebook is called a post Teacher: Excellent Aamir: Per sir maine bhi toh ye hi kaha lekin seedhe shabdon mein Teacher: Seedhe shabdon me karna hai toh kisi aur page ke admin bano Aamir: Par sir dusre admin bhi toh Teacher: Get out Aamir: Kya Sir ? Teacher: Seedhe shabdon mein kahun toh bahar jayiye Aamir goes out and comes back Teacher: Kya hua? Aamir: Kuch bhool gaya tha sir Teacher: Kya? Aamir: An utility button given to us to protect our private data i e pictures messages or personal information for being stolen or used for bad purpose by hackers or anyone else Teacher: Kehna kya chahte ho??? Aamir: Logout sir Logout karna bhool gaya tha Teacher: Seedha seedha nahi bol sakte the? Aamir: Sir thodi der pehle try kiya tha but aapko pasand nahi aaya

Bechaara shaadi shuda aadmi dukhi bhi nahi ho sakta Wife: I love you baby Husband (softly): I love you too Wife: Upset kyun lag rahe ho ??? Husband: Bas thoda mood off tha Wife: Doston ke saath to bade khush rehte ho aur mere saath hi drame Husband (pyar se): Aisa kuch nahi jaanu tabiyat thodi theek nahi hai Wife: Haan agar abhi koi dost phone kare to 2 sec mein tabiyat theek ho jayegi Husband: Dost kahan se aa gaye mera mood thoda upset hai bas Wife: Mere saath hi ye sab hota hai friends ke saath enjoy karte ho badi has has ke pictures click karwate ho Ya koi aur ladki pasand aa gayi ?? Husband (aur jyada pyar se): Arrey kahan se kahan baat le jaa rahi ho? Wife: Aaj sab clear hoga Husband: Kya clear karna hai jaanu aisa kya ho gaya?? Wife (khud confused): Jab tum khud clear nahi tumhe kuch pata nahi to main kya bolun Husband (trying to act smart): Tumhe hua kya hai ?? Kis baat pe upset ho ?? Batao Wife: Tumhari sangat hi kharab hai Husband: Mere saath to tum ho Wife: Ab bohut ho gaya ab aur nahi Husband (fully crashed): Yeh toh bata do ki hua kya hai ? Wife: Hum ab saath nahi reh sakte? Husband: Ye baat kahan se aayi? Wife: I want Divorce Husband: Hmmmm OK Wife (gone crazy): Haan yehi chahte ho tum to phir tum jo marzi kar sako Husband: Arrey tumne khudne bola abhi maine kya galat kaha?? Wife: Itni problem thi to bola kyun nahi main khud bina bole chali jaati tumhari life se Husband (apne baal pakad kar): Mujhe meri galti toh bata do Wife: Waqt aane pe pata chalegi tumhe apne aap jab main chali jaungi Husband: Achcha to main wait karta hoon sahi waqt ka Wife: Tum serious kab hoge?? Husband: Ab kya hospital mein admit ho jaun serious hone ke liye? Wife: Go to hell AFTER 3 HOURS Wife: Tumhe pata hai na main tumhare bina nahi reh sakti jaanu sorry I love you my baby Husband (Sab bhool kar): Achcha Really I love you tooo Wife: Upset kyun lag rahe ho ?

Kabir: Aisi Baani boliye Man Ka Aapa Khoye Auron Ko Sheetal Kare Aaphi Sheetal Hoye SE: Aisa presentation dijiye man ka aapa khoye Auron ko confuse kare aaphi confuse hoye Kabir: Guru Govind Doyu Khade Kaake Laagu Paye Balihari Guru Aapke Govind Diyo Bataye SE: Client Aur Manager Doyu Khade Kaake Laagu Paye Balihaari Client Aapke Manager Diyo Bataye Rahim: Rahiman Dhaaga Prem Ka Mat Todo Chatkaye Tode Se Phirr Jude Na Jude Gaanth Pad Jaaye SE: SE Confidence Manager Mat Todo Chatkaye Project To Barbaad Hoye Hi Appraisal Mein Waat Lag Jjaye Kabir: Dheere Dheere Re Mana Dheere Sab Kuch Hoye Maali Seenche Sow Ghara Ritu Aaye Phal Hoye SE: Dheere dheere Re Project Leader Dheere Project Execute Hoye Client Dikhaye Kitni Bhi Urgency Release Deadline Ke Baad Hi Hoye Kabir: Jab Tu Aaya Jagat Mein Log Hanse Tu Roye Aise Karni Na Kari Pache Hanse Sab Roye SE: Jab Project Aaye Company Mein Client Hase Hum Roye Aisi Karni Na Kari Tu Hase Client Roye Kabir: Dukh Mein Sumiran Sab Kare Sukh Mein Kare Na Koye Jo Sukh Mein Sumiran Kare Tau Dukh Kahe Ko Hoye SE: Rush Hour Mein Kaam Sab Karein Routine Mein Kare Na Koye Jo Routine Mein Sab Kaam Kare To Rush Hour Kaahe Hoye Kabir: Pothhi Padh Padh Jag Mooya Pandit Bhaya Na Koye Dhai Aakhar Prem Ka Padhe So Pandit Hoye SE: Coding Kar Kar Jag Mooya Programmer Bhaya Na Koye Do Shabd Copy-Paste Ke Kare So Programmer Hoye Kabir: Chalati Chakki Dekh Ke Diya Kabira Roye Do Paatan Ke Beech mein Saabut Bacha Na Koye SE: Client Aur Manager Ko Dekhke Engineers Saare Roye Deadline Meet Karne Ke Chakkar Mein Saabut Bacha Na Koye Kabir: Chinta Aisee Dakini Kat Kaleja Khaye Vaid Bichara Kya Kare Kahan Tak Dawa Lagaye SE: Deadline Aisi Dakini Man Ka Tension Badhaaye Kaam Itna Ho Sar Par Time Pe Complete Kaise Ho Paaye Kabir: Maala To Kar Mein Phire Jeebh Phire Mukh Mahin Manua To Chahun Dish Phire Yeh To Sumiran Nahin SE: Engineer Gaye sab Cigarette Peene Leader Phire Office Maahin Cubicle Se Jyaada Time Canteen Pe Rahe Yeh To Dedication Naahin

Pyaar + Kkhayal = Maa Pyaar + Dar = Papa Pyaar + Saath = Behan Pyaar + Ladai = Bhai Pyaar + Zindagi = Girlfriend Pyaar + Masti = Friends Pyaar+Khayal+Dar +Saath+Ladai+Zindagi+Masti =Wife Married life is so easy It s just like a walk in the Park but the problem is that the Park is Jurassic Park Lo karlo walk

Pappu: Papa Aunty ka pet itna kyun foola hua hai ? Santa: I know ki tu sab Jan ta hai badmaash Pappu: Nahin papa I don t know Santa: Chal Chal jhooth mat bol Pappu: Trust me dad pease batao na please please please Pappu: Wo yaar aunty ke pet mein paani bhara hua hai Pappu: Oh Achcha Phir toh bachcha doob jayega

A man fron UP is introducing his family: 1 Yeh hai meri biwi Google Raani Ek sawal poocho toh 10 jawab deti hai 2 Yeh hai mera beta Facebook Kumar Ghar ki baat sare colony tak pahuchata hai 3 Yeh hai meri beti Twitter Kumari Poori colony isko folow karti hai 4 Aur mein mein hun Orkut Kumar Mujhe koi puchhta hi nahi

Ladies of 1970s: Husb: Ek cup Coffee Wife: Abhi laee ji Ladies of 1980s: Husb: Ek cup Coffee Wife: Abhi laee Ladies of 1990s: Husb: Ek cup Coffee Wife: Laa rahi hu Ladies of 2000: Husb: Ek cup Coffee Wife: Banake pee le Ladies of 2014: Husb: Ek Cup Coffee Wife: Kya kaha? Husb: Maine kaha ek cup coffee bana du kya?

Gutthi - Cricket Cricket - Match Match - Team Team - India India - Australia Australia - Bada Score Bada Score - India India - Aasan Jeet Asaan Jeet - Khushi Khushi - Sidhu Pajji Sidhu Pajji - Thoko Taali Australia Ne Samjha India ko Ullu Australia Ne Samjha India ko Ullu 359 runs bana ke bhi kya mila - BABAJI KA THULLU

Nayi nayi friendship hui Facebook pe numbers exchange hue aur phir Girl: Hello darling Kya kar rahe ho ??? Boy: Hai Jaanu Shave kar raha hoon Girl: Jab bhi mai tum ko call karti hoon tum shave kar rahe hote ho din mein kitni baar Shave krte ho ?? Boy: 30-40 baar Girl: Tum Pagal ho kya ??? Boy: Nahi jaanu mainn Barber hun

Pati Patni Ki Ladayi Ho Rahi Thi Pati Ne Patni Se Puchha: Kya Tumne Mujhe Kutta Kaha??? Biwi Ne Koi Jawab Nahi Diya Pati Ne Fir Se Puchha: Kya Tumne Mujhe Kutta Kaha??? Biwi Fir Chupp Rahi Pati Ne Ek Baar Aur Puchha: Main Tumse Kuch Puch Raha Hun Kya Tumne Mujhe Kutta Kaha??? Biwi: Nahi Kaha Aur Please Ab Bhaunkna Band Karo

Ladka apni friend se: Mere paas mere dost jaisi car nahi hai; Par tumhein palkon pe baitha ke ghumaaunga Uske jaisa bada ghar nahi hai; Par tumhein dil mein rakhunga Uske jitne paise nahi hain; Par tumhein majdoori kar ke khilaunga Aur kya chahiye tumhein???? Ladki: Bas kar pagle ab rulayega kya ? Chal apne dost ka number de

Santa Police station ja kar kehta hai: Inspector saab mujhe ek FIR likhwaani hai Inspector: Kaun ho tum kya hua aur kiske khilaaf FIR karwaani hai? Santa: Mujhe phone par jaan se marne ki dhamki mil rahi hai Inspector: Kaun de raha hai dhamkiyaan tumko aur kya bol raha hai? Santa: BSNL wale kehte hai bill nahi bhara to kaat denge

Pappu ko hamesha apne papa se daant padti rehti thi kyunki vo studies mein below average tha Ek din jab dono ek saath baith kar TV dekh rahe the tab achanak Pappu bola: Papa Dekhna jab main business karunga na toh achche achchon ke haath mein katora pakda dunga Santa hairaani se: Achcha Wo kaise? Pappu haste hua bola: Gol-Gappe bechka