Chintu chup ke cigarette pee raha tha tabhi us ke papa aa gaye Chintu ne ghabrahat mein jaldi se cigarette shirt ki jeb mein chupa li Papa gusse se: Kya tum cigarette pee rahe the? Chintu: Nahin toh Papa: Toh phir tumhari shirt se yeh dhuwan kyun nikal raha hai? Chintu: Papa aap ne baat hi dil jalane wali ki hai toh dhuan toh niklega hi
Banta TRAIN mein chadne laga tab akashwani hui: Is mein mat chad yeh patri se utar jayegi Jab Banta PLANE mein chadne laga tab awaaj aayi: Ye crash ho jayega Jab vo BUS chadne laga tab awaaz aayi: Yeh khai mein gir jayegi Banta gusse se: Kaun hai? Aawaz: GOD Banta: Shadi ke waqt jab GHODI chad raha tha tab aapka gala baith gaya tha kya?
Kapil: O Ji Maine Kaha Nice Lipstick Girl: Thanks Kapil: O Ji Main Kya Nice Top And Jeans Girl: Thanks Kapil: O Ji Main Kya Nice Ear-Rings Girl: Thanks Kapil: Aur Toh Aur Nice Necklace Girl: Thank you so much BHAIYA Kapil: Kamaal Hai Itni Saari Achchi Cheezein Pehan Kar Bhi Tu Bhootni Hi Lag Rahi Hai Ladki Ko Mila Baba Ji Ka Thullu
Ek husband ne apni wife ko ek SMS bheja: Thanks for making my life wonderful and being a part of my life What ever I am is only because of you You are my angel thanks for coming in my life and making it worth living You re Great Uski wife ne reply bheja: Pee li hai na ? Ab chup chap ghar aa jao DARO MAT KUCHH NAHI BOLUNGI Husband: Thank you
A man got a call from unknown number Girl: Hi are you single??? Man: Yes but who are you ??? Ans: Your wife Aaj Ghar Aana Tab Bataoungi Another call from unknown number Girl: Are you married ?? Man: Yes but who are you ?? Girl: Your girlfriend you cheat Man: Sorry baby I thought it was my wife Ans: Wife Hi Hoon Kamine Aaj Tu Bas Ghar Aaja
Pandit ek ladki waale ghar mein shaadi k liye ladke ki baat karne gaya Pandit: Aap logon ko kaisa ladka chahiye? Ladki Wale: Humein aisa ladka chahiye jo paan cigarette daaru gutkha jarda ya aur koi bhi nashe na karta ho boiled khana khata ho aur bhagwaan ka naam jaapta ho Pandit: Yajman ji aisa ladka toh aapko sirf ICU mein hi mil sakta hai
Santa aur uski wife Jeeto mein jhagda hua toh Jeeto ne apni maa ko phone kiya Maa mera un se jhagda ho gaya hai Main 1 month ke liye aap ke paas aa rahi hun Jeeto s mother Jhagda kis ne start kiya?????? Jeeto Unho ne Jeeto s mother: Jhagda us kambakhat ne kiya hai saza bhi ushe hi milni chahiye Tum wahi thehro main aa rahi hun 3 Month k liye
3rd class ka bachcha apni Miss se kehta hai: Main aapko kaisa lagta hun ? Miss: Too sweet and cute Bachcha: Toh phir main apne mummi-papa ko aap ke ghar kab bhej dunu ?? Miss: Wo kyon? Bachcha: Taaki wo hamari baat aage chalayein Miss: Yeh kya bakwas hai Baccha: Tution padhane ke liye Miss aap bhi na kasam se TV dekh dekh ke kharab ho gayi hain
Life mein 2 baatein hamesha yaad rakhna Pehli Baat: Har insaan itna bura nahin hota jitna PAN Card Aur Aadhar Card mein dikhta hai Aur itna achcha bhi nahin hota jitna Facebook aur Whatsapp pe dikhta hai Dusri Baat: Har insaan itna bura nahin hota jitna uski Biwi GF usko samajhti hai Aur itna achcha bhi nahin hota Jitna uski Maa usko samjhti hai
Two best friends coming out of the examination hall with chips and coke in hands First friend: Yaa aaj kaun sa paper tha??? Second friend: Shayad Maths ka tha yaar but I m not sure First friend (surprisingly): Oye you read the question paper??? Second Friend: Arrey nahin yaar Mere paas kahan time tha I saw a girl sitting besides me using a calculato
A man got a call from unknown number Caller: Hi are you single ??? Man: Yes but who are you ??? Caller: Your wife Aaj ghar aana tab bataoongi Another call from unknown number Caller: Are you married ? Man: Yes but who are you ?? Caller: Your girlfriend U cheat Man: Sorry baby I thought it was my wife Caller: Wife hi hoon kamine aaj tum bas ghar aao
Pathan: Wo jo table pe aadmi baitha hai us se hamara dushmani hai Dost: Table pe toh 4 aadmi hain Pathan: Wo jiski muchhein hain Dost: Muchhein to sub ki hain Pathan: Wo jis ne safed kapre pehan rakhe hain Dost: Wo toh sub ke safed hain Pathan ne gusse mein pistol nikala aur 3 aadmion ko goli maar di aur bola: Wo jo reh gaya hai usko hum nahi chhorega
Malik apne aalsi naukar se: Yahan par itne sare machchar goon-goon kar rahen hain tu in sabko maar de Thodi der baad Malik: Oye aalsi kahin ke maine tujhe machchar maarne ko kaha tha abhi tak tune mare nahin? Woh ab bhi goonn-goon kar rahe hain Aalsi naukar: Malik machchar toh maine saare maar diye hain Yeh toh unki biwiyaan hain jo vidhva ho kar ro rahi hain
Wife to her husband: Suno aate hue zara kitchen se namak lete aana Husband (kitchen se): Yahan to koi Namak nahi hai Wife: Mujhe pata tha tum toh ho hi andhe kaamchor kahin ke Ek kaam dhang se nahi kar sakte bas bahane banaate rehte ho zindagi mein kuch to kaam karo Mujhe pehle se hi pata tha ki tumhe nahin milega isliye mein pehle hi le aayi thi Husband shocked
If movies were made by drinkers then the titles would be Soda Akbar Rab Ne Pila di Thodi Rum De Basanti Hum Tight Ho Chuke Sanam Beer Zara Bevde Zameen Par Ek Tha Bagpiper Talli six Rum Maro Rum Maine Drink Tujko Diya Bewdy Rathore Hickk Hick Hota Hai DaaruDas Hum Tunn Maine Neat Kyu Piya Peg Piya Toh Darna Kya Ulti Kar Di Aapne Whiskiya Pinewale Baatliyaa Le Jayenge
