Ek Aadmi Samundar Mein Nahate Huye Doobne Laga Toh Usne Dua Ki: Hey Bhagvan Agar Mein Bach Gaya Toh Biryani Ki Deg Garibo Ko Khilaunga Tabhi Ek Badi Si Lehar Aati Hai Aur Usko Utha Ke Sahil Pe Phenk Deti Hai Usne Upar Dekha Aur Kaha: Hehe Kaunsi Biryani Kaisi Biryani Achanak Ek Aur Lehar Aayi Aur Usko Waapas Samundar Mein Ley Gayi Tab Vo Aadmi Phir Se Uapar Dekhta Hai Aur Kehta Hai: Mera Matlab Tha Chicken Ya Mutton Ya Veg Biryani

1 Subaah subaah garam paani milega Bartan dhone ke liye 2 Pyaare pyaare bachche milenge Aapko gadha Banaane ke liye 3 Har roz biwi aapse pyar se nolegi Ration laane ke liye 4 Biwi aapke baahon me baahein daalegi Kharcha paani ke liye 5 Aap gaana gaana shuru kar doge Bachchon ko sulaane ke liye 6 Wo roz taiyaar hokar saamne aayegi Shopping jaane ke liye 7 Aapko bhi whiskey ka mazaa ayegaa Kuch der gum bhulaane ke liye NO LIFE WITHOUT WIFE

Girlfriend: I am just too fed up from our daily fights I just wanna break up with you Boyfriend: Kya hua yaar? Girlfriend: Mein ab tumhaare saath nahin rah sakti mein jaa rahi hun Boyfriend: Theek hai theek hai par pehle yeh chocolate toh le lo Girlfriend: Ohhhh so you don t want me to go manaa rahe ho na mujhe choclate deke Boyfriend: Nahin re pagal meri maa kehti hai ki koi bhi shubh kaam karne se pehle munh zoaroor meetha kar lena chahiye

Sunny Leone: Mujhe Koi aisi Sabzi Do Jiske 7 Phaayde Hon Sabziwaala: Ye Lo Madam Gajar 1 : Pasand Aaye Toh Aloo Matar Ke Saath Paka Lena Warna 2 Juice Bana Ke Pe Sakti Ho Nahi Toh 3 Salad Bana Sakti Ho Ye Bhi Na Theek Lage Toh 4 Gaajar Ka Halwa Bana Lena Nahi Toh 5 Chinese Noodles Mein Daal Lena Aisa Bhi Nahi Toh Phir 6 Murabba Bana Sakte Ho Aur Agar Ye Bhi Na Pasand Aaye Toh 7 Achaar Bana Lena Bhai Jo Tu Dhoond Raha Hai Woh Yahan Nahin Milga

Banta ki biwi kaafi bimar thi aur hospital mein admit thi Doctors ne 1 week tak uska check-up kiya sab tests kiye Saari reports aane ke baad ek senior doctor ne Banta ko bulaya aur kaha: Banta ji ek baat batani hai apko Banta: Ji doctor saaba kahiye Doctor: We are sorry Banta ji apki biwi jyada se jyada 1-2 months ki mehman hai Banta: Docor saab ismein sorry waali kya baat hai? Jahan itna time nikaal diya gujar jayenge ye 1-2 mahine bhi jais-taise

Santa was caught by police Police: How did you kill 20 people? Santa: Main gaadi tez chala raha tha par jab maine brake lagaya toh pata laga ki brake fail ho gaya hain Phir main ne samne dekha toh ek taraf 2 aadmi ja rahe the aur dusri taraf 1 barat ja rahi thi Ab aap hi batao main gaadi kidhar modta? Police: Of course jis taraf 2 admi the Nuksaan kam hota Santa: Exactly Maine bhi yahi socha tha par woh 2 aadmi meri gaadi dekh kar barat me ghus gaye

Reactions of a Girl without a boyfriend: 1) Main nahi padti in chakkaro meine 2) Mere liye mere gharwale important hain aur unke saamne boyfriend kuch bhi nahi 3) Sab Ladke Ek Jaise Hi Hote Hain Same Girl after having a boyfriend: 1) Yaar pata nahi kaise ho gaya pyaar uske siway kuch nahi dikhta ab mujhe 2) Gharwalon ko manana padega kaise bhi I can t leave him and mein uske bin nahin rah sakti 3) Wo baaki ladkon ki tarah nahi hai he loves me a lot

Ek Pathan Ke 3 Bachche Hue Usne Unke Naam Rakhe: 1) Hasrat Khan 2) Harkat Khan 3) Barkat Khan 2 Saal Baad Uske Yahan Phir 3 Bachche Hue Usne Is Baar Unke Naam Rakhe: 1) Dariya Khan 2) Samandar Khan 3) Sailaab Khan Next Time Phir Se 3 Bachche Hue Aur Is Baar Naam The: 1) Himmat Khan 2) Housla Khan 3) Bardasht Khan Har Baar Ki Tarah Jab Is Baar Bhi Uske Yahan 3 Bachche Hue Toh Is Baar Naam Biwi Ne Rakhe: 1) Bas Kar Khan 2) Sharam Kar Khan 3) Reham Kar Khan

Once 3 boys proposed the same girl 1st: Main tumhare liye apni jaan bhi de sakta hun Girl: Woh toh sab kehte hain 2nd Guy: Main tumhare liye chaand tare tod kar la sakta hun Girl: Nothing special bahut purana dialogue hai 3rd Guy: Main tumhe apna Facebook ka pasword tak de sakta hun Yahan tak ki apna facebook account delete bhi kar sakta hun Girl Ankhon main ansu ke sath: Pagal itna chahta hai mujhe ? I Love You Too Doston Facebook Badi Cheeaz Hai

Husband: Wow Tum itni Gulabi kaise lag rahi ho??? Wife: When your lovely words touch the bundle branches of the circulation system of my heart it starts beating faster increased output is trans mitted to adrenals which start secreting glucon to increase blood glucose level to combatthis emergency Pituitary output also increases which raises blood estrogen level Causing vasodilation and I look PINK MORAL: Jyada padhi likhi biwi romance ki Mummy-Didi ek kar deti hai

A guy got stuck on a Rs 1 crore question He uses phone-a-friend helpline and chooses his girlfriend to ask the answer Amitabh Bachchan: Girlfriend ji Namashkaar mein Amitabh Bachchan bol raha hun KBC se Abhi aapke mitra aap se ek prashan puchenge aur aap ko sirf 30 seconds mein us prashan ka uttar dene hai Aapka samay shuru hota hai ab Boy reads out the question and the 4 options Girl: Mil gaya time tumhe phone karne ka ? Mujhe tumse koi baat nahi karni Byeeeee

Ladka: Tumhaara naam kya hai? Ladki: Kyun bataun? Main tumhe jaanti tak nahin Ladka: Theek hai mat batao main kaun sa tumhe apni BMW mein bitha raha hun Ladki: Mein Sheila hun B Com second year mein padti hun Saamne waali gali mein seedhe haath ki tarf chauthe number pe ghar hai mera - House number 322B top floor Ghar mein mummy papa aur ek chota brother hai Aur haan shaam ko 6-8 baje tak tution jaati hun Ladka: Ok thanks jis din BMW lunga us din zaroor bithaunga

Ek Baar Santa USA Ghumne Gaya Wahan Ek Din Jab Santa Shopping Kar Raha Tha Tabhi 1 Building Mein Aag Lag Gayi Santa Fire Brigade Waalon Se Bola: Tum Logon Ko Neeche Phenko Main Sabko Catch Karunga Pehle 1 Ladka Aaya Phir Ek Ladki Phir Ek Aadmi Phir Ek Aurat Santa Ne Sabko Pakad Liya Phir Ek Negro Aaya Toh Santa Ne Chhod Diya Jab Fire Brigade Walon Ne Santa Se Poocha Ki Usne Negro Ko Kyun Nahin Pakda Toh Santa Bola: Abe Saalo Jo Jal Gaye Hain Unko Toh Mat Phenko

Kanjoos baap k bete ne kaha: Papa meri girfriend pregnant ho gayi hai 50 000 mang rahi hai CHUP rehne ke Kanjoos baap ne khamoshi se paise de diye 2 mahine baad dusra beta bola: Meri girlfriend pregnant hai 75 000 mang rahi hai CHUP rehne ke Kanjoos baap ne ek baar phir khamoshi se paise de diye 6 mahine baad Kanjoos ki kuwari beti boli: Papa I am pregnant Kanjoos ne usko gale se lagaya aur maatha chum ke khushi se bola: Shabaash beti ab paise lene ki baari hamari hai

Ek college ke final years ke kuch boys ek group banakar tirth yatra par jaate hain Yakinan saare students young the isliye group leader ne kaha Hum sab tirthyatra par ja rahe hain bhagwaan ke darshanon ke liye Isliye koi aisi waisi harkat mat karna ya koi ulti-seedhi baat mat bolna Agar tumhe koi sundar ladki dikhayi di to apni aankhein band kar lena aur kehna Hari Om Thodi der baad ek ladke ne apni aankhein band karli aur bola Hari Om Sabhi ladke: Kahan hai? Kahan hai?