Pamela the church gossip and self-appointed supervisor of the church s morals kept sticking her nose into other people s business Several residents were unappreciative of her activities but feared her enough to maintain their silence She made a mistake however when she accused Tony a new member of being an alcoholic after she saw his pickup truck parked in front of the town s only bar one afternoon She commented to Tony and others that everyone seeing it there would know that he was an alcoholic Tony a man of few words stared at her for a moment and just walked away He said nothing Later that evening Tony quietly parked his pickup in front of Pamela s house and he left it there all night

One morning Lisa and Sadie decided to go out for breakfast The waitress told them that the special that morning was two eggs tomatoes mushrooms hash browns and toast for £3 99 That sounds good said Sadie but I don t want the eggs OK said the waitress but I will then have to charge you £4 50 Why asked Lisa it doesn’t make sense Because you will then in effect be ordering a la carte the waitress replied Do you mean I ll have to pay for not taking the eggs? Sadie asked Yes replied the waitress OK then I ll take the special says Sadie How do you want your eggs done? asked the waitress Raw and in the shell Sadie replied At the end of the meal Sadie took the two eggs home

Tom Dick and Harry were in the pub enjoying a few quiet drinks one night when they decided to get in on the weekly raffle They bought five tickets each seeing it was for charity The following week when the raffle was drawn they each won a prize Tom won the first prize - a whole year s supply of Gourmet Spaghetti sauce Dick was the winner of the second prize - six month s supply of extra-long Gourmet Spaghetti And Harry won the sixth prize - a Toilet Brush When they met in the pub a week later Harry asked the others how they were enjoying their prizes Great said Tom I love spaghetti So do I said Dick And how s the toilet brush Harry? Not so good Harry said I reckon I ll go back to pape

Top ten reasons why men prefer guns over women: 10 - You can trade an old 44 for a new 22 9 - You can keep one gun at home and have another for when you re on the road 8 - If you admire a friend s gun and tell him so he will probably let you try it out 7 - Your primary gun doesn t mind if you keep another gun for a backup 6 - Your gun will stay with you even if you run out of ammo 5 - A gun doesn t take up a lot of closet space 4 - Guns function normally every day of the month 3 - A gun doesn t ask Do these new grips make me look fat? 2 - A gun doesn t mind if you go to sleep after you use it And the Number One reason Why Men Prefer Guns over women 1 - You can buy a silencer for a gun

An elderly couple were driving across the country The woman was driving when she got pulled over by the highway patrol The officer said Ma`am did you know you were speeding? The woman turns to her husband and asked What did he say? The old man yelled He says you were speeding The patrolman said May I see your license? The woman turned to her husband and asked What did he say? The old man yelled He wants to see your license The woman gave him her license The patrolman said I see you are from Texas I spent some time there once and went on a blind date with the ugliest woman I`ve ever seen The woman turned to her husband and asked What did he say? The old man yelled He thinks he knows you

One day in a language school in Australia Teacher: All right now I`d like you to make a sentence using the words GREEN PINK and YELLOW Who`d like to try? A student raised his hand It was Kukoya from Japan Kukoya: Early this morning I looked out the window I saw the GREEN grass and PINK roses in the garden I went outside and I feel the warm YELLOW sunlight around me Teacher: Not bad Okay who`s next? Another student raised his hand It was Weng from Singapore Weng: I try I try Can aaah? Teacher No no not you Weng: Aaaiiyaaa let me try lah I can do lah you think I`m stupid meeeh ? Teacher: Okay go ahead Weng: This morning I heard the phone GREEEEEN GREEEEEN I PINK it up and I said YELLOOOOW?

A young executive was leaving the office of a major corporation late one evening when he found the CEO himself standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand Eager to make a good impression the young exec introduced himself and asked if he could be of any help Why yes said the CEO holding up the piece of paper This is a very sensitive and important document and my secretary has gone for the night Can you make this thing work? Certainly said the young executive happy for a chance to help the boss The young man turned the machine on inserted the paper and pressed the start button Excellent excellent said the CEO as his paper disappeared inside the machine I ll need two copies

It s Christmas time and Bill and Joe decided to go look for a Christmas Tree They gathered their axe a sled and a broom to brush the trees off so they can get a good look at them When they finally reach a fine stand of trees Joe brushes off the first tree and stands back with Bill to look at it Well Bill What do you think? Sorry Joe this tree won t do Let s try another one They come upon another nice tree Joe brushes it off and they both look at it How about this one Bill? Not quite Joe Let s keep looking This goes on until nightfall Both Bill and Joe are cold tired and hungry Well Bill what do we do now? Joe I think we should take home the next tree we find whether it has lights on it or not

वा बोली मेरे गाम मै ना आया कर मेरे भाई पकड लेंगे तनै
मै बोल्या रै बावली मनै तो कदे Temple Run आला बान्दर ना पकड सका तेरे भाई के चीज है

हम भारतियों में कोई और टैलेंट हो ना हो लेकिन
जहाँ से स्पीड ब्रेकर टूटा हो वहाँ से गाड़ी निकालने का टैलेंट ज़रूर होता है।

It s Christmas time and Bill and Joe decided to go look for a Christmas Tree They gathered their axe a sled and a broom to brush the trees off so they can get a good look at them When they finally reach a fine stand of trees Joe brushes off the first tree and stands back with Bill to look at it Well Bill What do you think? Sorry Joe this tree won t do Let s try another one They come upon another nice tree Joe brushes it off and they both look at it How about this one Bill? Not quite Joe Let s keep looking This goes on until nightfall Both Bill and Joe are cold tired and hungry Well Bill what do we do now? Joe I think we should take home the next tree we find whether it has lights on it or not

Bill James and David were in the pub enjoying a few quiet drinks one night when they decided to get in on the weekly raffle They bought five 1 tickets each seeing it was for charity The following week when the raffle was drawn they each won a prize Bill won the first prize - a whole year s supply of gourmet spaghetti sauce James was the winner of the second prize - six month s supply of extra-long gourmet spaghetti And David won the sixth prize - a toilet brush When they met in the pub a week later David asked the others how they were enjoying their prizes Great said Bill I love spaghetti So do I said James And how s the toilet brush David? Not so good David said I reckon I ll go back to pape

एक छोटा बच्चा रोड पर पोट्टी कर रहा था पुलिस ने उसे पकड़ लिया
जब उसे ले जाने लगे तो बच्चा बोला ओ कानून के रखवालो सबूत तो ऊठा लो

Two men are escaping from a Mental Hospital late one moonless night They get to the roof of the hospital and all they have to do is jump a pretty good distance across to the next building and they are home free The first man a psychotic and afraid of nothing is willing jump The second man however is afraid of the dark and is seriously considering returning to the hospital to deal with the issue The first man volunteers to jump across with the flashlight they have brought with them and then shine the light back across to the second man You can walk across on the beam of light and we will be away You must be crazy replies the second man you ll turn the flashlight off when I m halfway across and I`ll fall

A noted psychiatrist was a guest at a chic gathering and his hostess naturally broached the subject in which he was most at ease Would you mind telling me Doctor she asked how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal? Nothing is easier he replied I ask him a simple question which everyone should answer with no trouble at all If he hesitates that tells me just what I need to know What sort of question? Well I might ask him Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them Which one? The hostess thought for a moment then said with a nervous laugh You wouldn t happen to have another example would you? I must confess I don t know much about history