The only thing I gained so far in 2016 is weight :)

Life is so much funnier when you have a dirty mind.

My friend wants to know if you think I’m hot.

Relationship Status: Looking for a WiFi connection.

I`m not arguing, I`m just explaining why I`m right.

Squirrel who runs up woman s leg does not find nuts

The only thing I gained so far in 2013 is weight :)

If winning isn t everything why do they keep score?

Relationship Status: Looking for a WiFi connection.

GOOGLE must be a woman because it knows everything.

I don`t have a bad handwriting, I have my own font.

Behind every great man, there is a surprised woman.

"don t drink and drive you might spill your beer" :)

Life is too short, smile while you still have teeth.

If at first you don t succeed...call it Version 1.0.