The mini heart attack ... when you re in bed half asleep and you suddenly feel you re falling. : :P

Wouldn,t it be nice if the world was flat? That way we could just push off the people we don,t like

That sad moment when your internet doesn t work and you don t know what to do with your life. :( :P

Reason why I check my sms... 5% Because I care about my relation, 95% to remove that annoying icon.

I hate when I`m trying to sleep & my mind says- You know what`s a great movie? Paranormal activity.

Am I the only person that texts people like 4 messages at a time that could easily be put into one?

I m actually not funny to some people, I m just really mean to them and they think I m joking... :

Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It’s not fair that some men should be happier than others.

I m not saying I hate you. I m just saying if you got hit by a bus, I would be driving that bus. :p

I told my girl friend to think before you speak and I haven’t heard a word from her since. :p

Sometimes I wish my dog could talk, but then I remember all the crazy shit he s witnessed me doing.

All the ‘likes’ collected from this post will be donated back to you at a later time :)

My friend has just updated his status saying. Is balancing on the edge of a cliff.. So i poked him.

A monkey turns on his PC,goes to internet,opens facebook statuses, and now he is reading this status

Shaadi karni ho to apni GF se karo,
Dusro ki GF se toh Gharwale bhi kara dete hai. ;) :P