Aaj Jo Ek Aurat Ke Saath Hua Woh Kisi Dushman Ke Saath bhi Na Ho Subhay Uthi Breakfast Banaya Lunch Banaya Bachchon Ko Khilaya Pati Ko Khilaya Unhe Tayaar Kar Ke Unka Tiffin Pack Kar Ke Unhe Bheja Joothay Bartan Ikhata Karke Rakh Diye Kapde Washing Machine Mein Daal Diye Phir Shower Lene Chali Gayi Bahar Nikalkar Nail Paint Lagai Hair Dry Kiye Red Suit Pehna Kajal Lagaya Lipstick Lagai Hair Style Kiya Bus Duppata Lene Hi Waali Tthi Ki Uska Mobile Baja Pucho Mat Ki Kya Hua Use Laga jaise Kisi Ne Garam Lohe Ka Hathoda Us Ke Kaan Par Maar Diya Ho Kya Kya Kya Bol rahi Hai Tu??? Memsaab Mereko Bukhar Hai AAj Kaam Par Nahi Aaaugi

Boy: I Love You Girl: Agar Main Bhi Ttumse I Love You Kahun Toh?? Boy: Main Toh Khushi Se Marrr Jaaunga Girl: Jaa Pagle Nahi Kehti JEE Le Apni Zindagi Boy: Tum Ladki Ho Ke Sharaab Peeti Ho??? Awesome reply by girl: Toh Kya 2-4 Peg Ke Liye Gender Change Karwaun ??? Operation Ke Baad Patient Bola: Doctor Sahab Kya Ab Main ROG MUKT Hun? Samne Se Jawab Mila: Beta Doctor Sahab Toh Dharti Par Rah Gaye Main Toh CHITR GUPT Hun Police: Aapke Ghar Kee Talaashi Leni Hai Santa: Kyon ? Police: Khabar Mili hai Ki Aapne Ek Khatarnaak Aatankwadi Ko apne Ghar Mein Rakhaa Hua Hai Santa: Khabar Toh Ekdum Pakki Hai Inspector Saab Par Aajkal woh Maayke Gayi Hui Hai

Class Ke Dauraan Ek Ladke Ne Apna Facebook Account khola Aur Status Update Kia: I am using fb in Class Professor Ne Us Pe Comment Kia: Class Se Nikal Jao Principal Ne Professor Ke Comment Ko Like Kia Dost Ne Comment Kia: Oye Cafe Aaja Maa Ne Comment Kia: Nalayak Kahin Ka Class Nahin Attend Karni Toh Sabzi Le Kar Ghar Aaja Baap Ne Bhi Comment KAr Dia: Dekh Lo Apne Bete Ki Harkatein Usi Waqt Girlfriend Ka Comment Aa Gaya: Dhokhe Baaz Tum Ne Toh Kaha Tha Ki Hospital Mein Hun Daadi Aakhri Stage Par Hain Isliye Milne Nahin Aa Sakta Aur Aakhiri Khatarnaak Commnent Bhi Padhiye Daadi Ji Ka Comment: Tere Munh Min Keede Padein Haraam Khor Main Abhi Zinda Hoon

Doctor: Tabiyat kaisi hai ab? Mareej: Pahle se jyada kharaab hai? Doctor: Dawai kha li thi? Mareej: Khali nahi thi bhari hui thi Doctor: I mean dawai le li thi? Mareej: Ji aap hi se toh li thi Doctor: Bewakoof dawai pee li thi? Mareej: Nahi ji dawai neeli thi Doctor: Abe gadhe dawai ko pee liya tha? Mareej: Nahi ji peeliya to mujhe tha Doctor: Ullu ke patthe dawai ko khol k muh me rakh liya tha? Mareej: Nahi aap hi ne to kaha tha ki fridge me rakhna Doctor: Abe kya mar khayega? Mareej: Nahi dawai khaunga Doctor: Nikal sale tu pagal kar dega Mareej: Ja raha hun par phir kab aaun? Doctor: Kayamat ke baad Mareej: Kayamat ke kitne din baad? Doctor behosh

Santa Aur Banta Daaru Pee Ke ghar Jaa Rahe The Tabhi Santa Chillya: Oye Banta Deewar Abe Saamne Dekh Deewar Hai MArwayega Kya Oye Kar Kya Raha Hai Yaar???? Dekh Aagey Deewar Hai Dhadaaaaam and They Hit The Wall The Next day in the hospital Santa asked Banta: Harami Thukwa Diya Na Kab Se Keh Raha Tha Deewar Hai Deewar Hai Deewar Hai Saale Sun Hi Nahi Raha Tha Tujhe Ek Baar Bhi Khayaal Nahin Aaya Ki Gharwale Intezaar Kar Rahe Honge? Gharwalon Aur Bbachchon Per Kya Beetegi? Aur Agar Hum Mar Jaate Toh Gharwalon Ka Kya Hota???? Bol Ab Daarubaaz Bolta Kyun Nahi Hai Kutte Sharaabi ??? Banta Karahte Hue: Oye Santa Gaadi Mein Nahin Tu Chala Raha Tha Sharaabi Bevde

Bank Manager Santa Ki Application Pe Ek Ajeeb Sa Signature Dekhta Hai /e Bank manager: Ye Kaisa Ajeeb Sa Signature Hai? Aur Kiska Sign Hai Ye??? Santa: Ye Sign Meri Daadii Ka Hai Bank Manager: Aisa Ajeeb Sa Sign? Kya Naam Hai Unka? Santa: Jalebi Baai Santa went to a restaurant in China Chinese Waiter: Sir I have Stewed Liver Boiled Tongue and Frog Legs Santa: Yaar Tu Apni Problems Chhodd Menu Card Le Aa Subah Subah Jeeto Ne Santa Se Newspaper Maanga Santa: Kitni Backward Ho Tum Duniya Kahan Se Kahan Pahunch Gayi Aur Tum Newspaper Maang Rahi Ho?? Ye Mera TAB Le Lo Jeeto Ne Tab Liya Aur Us Se Cockroach Maar Diya Santa Behosh Moral: Biwi Jo Maange De Do

Ek din khuda ne mujhse kaha: Mat kar intezar is janam mein uska Milna mushkil hai Maine bhi keh diya: Lene de maza intezar ka agle janam mein to mumkin hai Phir khuda ne kaha: Mat kar itna pyar bahut pachhtayega Muskura ke maine kaha: Dekhte hain tu kitna mujhe tadpayega Phir khuda ne kaha: Bhool ja use Chal tujhe jannat ki apsra se milata hu Maine kaha: Aa neeche dekh mere pyar ka muskurata chehra tujhe jannat ki apsra bhulvata hu Gusse mein khuda ne kaha: Mat bhool apni aukaat tu to ek insaan hai Haas kar Maine kaha: Toh mila de mujhe mere pyar se aur Saabit kar ki tu hi Bhagwan hai Phir khuda ne guuse mein uski mujhse shadi kara di Sab bhoot utar gaya

Once A man asked God: Why all the girls are so cute sweet and all wifes are always angry? God Answered: Girls are made by me and you make them Wife Your Problem Hubby came home drunk To avoid wife s scolding he took a laptop started working Wife: Peeke aye ho kya? Hubby: Nahi meri maa Wife: Phir suitcase khol ke kya type kar rahe ho??? There are two types of suicide (Fast Slow): Fast: Gale me rassi dalo and latak jao Slow: Gale me warmala dalo aur zindagi bhar latke raho Wife: Agar meri shaadi kisi Raakshas se bhi ho jaati to mai itni Pareshaan nahi hoti jitni tumare saath hun Awesome reply: Husband: Arrey pagli Blood Relation me shaadiyan kahan hoti hai

Ek din khuda ne mujhse kaha: Mat karintezar is janam mein uska Milna mushkil hai Maine bhi keh diya: Lene de maza intezar ka agle janam mein to mumkin hai Phir khuda ne kaha: Mat kar itna pyar bahut pachhtayega Muskura ke maine kaha: Dekhte hain tu kitna mujhe tadpayega Phir khuda ne kaha: Bhool ja use Chal tujhe jannat ki apsra se milata hoon Maine kaha: Aa neeche dekh mere pyar ka muskurata chehra tujhe jannat ki apsra bhulwata hoon Gusse mein khuda ne kaha: Mat bhool apni aukaat tu to ek insaan hai Hans kar maine kaha: Toh mila de mujhe mere pyar se aur saabit kar ki tu hi Bhagwan hai Phir khuda ne guuse mein uski mujhse shadi kara di Sab bhoot utar gaya

Girl: I Love You Boy: Ha ha ha Girl: I Miss You I Miss You Boy: Hahahahaha Girl: Me Tumhari Khatir Apni Jaan Bhi De Sakti Hun Boy: Hahahahahahahaha Girl: Tumhare Bina Me Zinda Nahi Reh Sakti Boy: Hahahahahahahahahahaha Girl: Mere Mummy Aur Daddy 1 Week Ke Liye Bahar Jaane Wale Hain Main Ekdum Akeli Rahungi Ghar Main Boy: Kab??? Girl: Hahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahahahaha hahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahah hahahahahahahaha hahahahahahaha hahahahahahahaha haha Boy: Kab Jaanu ?? Girl: Hahahahahahahaha hahahahahaha hahahaahahah haahahhaahhahahahahaha Boy: Bolo Na Janu Kabbb?? Girl: hahahahahahaha hahaahahah haahahhaahhahahahaha hahahahahahahaha haahahahhaahahhaahhahaha

Jiya Jale Jaan Jale Raat Bhar Dhuan Chale - Fever Tadap Tadap Ke Is Dil Se Aah Nikalti Rahi - Heart Attack Suhani Raat Dhal Chuki Na Jaane Tum Kab Aoge - Constipation Bidi Jalayle Jigar Se Piya Jigar Ma Badi Aag Hai - Acidity Tujh Mein Rab Dikhta Hai Yaara Main Kya Karoon - Cataract Tuje Yaad Na Meri Aayi Kisi Se Ab Kya Kehna - Alzheimer s Mann Dole Mera Tann Dole - Vertigo Tip-Tip Barsa Pani Pani Ne Aag Lagayi - Urinary Infection Dil Dhadak-Dhadak Ke Keh Raha Hai -Hypertension Aaj Kal Paaon Zameen Par Nahi Padte Mere - Corn On Feet Haay-Re-Haay Neend Nahi Aaye -Insomnia Batana Bhi Nahi Aata Chupana Bhi Nahi Aata - Piles And Sabse Mast Lagi Aaj Saawan Ki Phir Wo Zadi Hai - Loose Motion

TV Anchor Charwahe se: Aap Bakre ko kya khilate hain? Charwaha: Kale ko ya Safaid ko? Anchor: Safaid ko Charwaha: Ghass Anchor: Aur Kale ko? Charwaha: Use bhi Ghass Anchor: Inhain bandhte kidher ho? Charwaha: Kise Kale ko ya Safaid ko? Anchor: Safaid ko Charwaha: Bahar ke kamre mein Anchor: Aur Kale ko? Charwaha: Use bhi bahar ke kamre mein Anchor: Aur nehlate kaise ho? Charwaha: Kise Kale ko ya Safaid ko? Anchor: Kale ko Charwaha: Pani se Anchor: Aur Safaid ko? Charwaha: Use bhi pani se Anchor Ghusse se: Abey bewakoof admi jab dono ke saath ek jaisa karta hai to mujhse bar bar puchta kyu hai Kala ya Safaid ??? Charwaha: Kyu ke Safaid bakra mera hai Anchor: Aur kala? Charwaha: Woh bhi mera hai

Doctor pagal se: Ye kya hai? Pagal: Ye maine 500 panno ki kitab likhi hai Doctor: Tumne 500 panno pe kya likha? Pagal: 1st page pe likha hai Ek Raja ghode par baith ke jungal ki taraf chala aur akhri page pe likha ke wo Raja jungle pahunch gaya Doctor: To Kaminey beech ke 498 panno pe kya likha??? Pagal: Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik Tigdik tigdik tigdik tigdik Doctor: Teri ye kahani padhega kaun ? Pagal: WhatsApp par rakh dunga mere jaise log juroor padhenge

Ek ladka ek ladki ko bahut chahta tha lekin apne pyaar ka izhaar karne se darta tha Ek din us ladke ne socha ki chahe jo bhi ho jaaye vo us ladki ko msg kar ke I Love You zaroor kahega aur apne prem ka izhaar karega Usne raat ko apne mobile pe I Love You likha aur us ladki ke number pe SMS send kar diya Jaise hi vo sone laga tabhi uske mobile pe ek message aaya lekin usne decide kiya ki vo messages subah uth kar naha kar mandir se vaapas aa kar hi message check karega Raat bhar vo us ladki ke sapne dekhta raha Isi chakkar mein subah bhi jaldi uth gaya aur nahakar mandir chala gaya Mandir se aate hi usne mobile uthaya aur message pada Message the: A/C balance is insufficient Main bal is Rs 08 Msg can not be send

Chitrgupt Bohut Pareshaan The Aurr Brahma Ji Se Bole: Hey Prabhu Ye Karvachauth Ke Vratt Se 7 Janam Tak Ek Hi Pati Milne Wali Yojna Band Kar Dein Bramha Ji Ne Pucha- Kyon? Kya Hua?Chitrgupt: Prabhu Manage Karna Mushkil Ho Gaya Hai Sabhi Aurteein 7 Janam Tak Wahi Purush Maangti Hai Par Sabhi Purush Har Bar Dusri Aurat Maangte Hai Bohot Dikkat Ho Rai Hai Brahma Ji Ne Kaha: Ye Scheme Aadi Kaal Se Chali Aa Rahi Hai Ise Band Nahi Kia Jaa Sakta Prithvi Par Ek Santa Naam Ka Prani Rehta Hai Usse Jaa kar Salah Lijiye Chitrgupt Santa Ke Paas Gaye or Unse Salah Maangi Santa Bola: Jo Bhi Aurat 7 Janam Tak Wahi Pati Demand Kare Use Dedo Par Saath Mein Shart Bhi RakhDo Ke Pati Wahi Chahiye Toh Saas Bhi Wahi Milegi Demand Apne Aap Band