Banta: You have got a double-chin Santa: It s not my fault Banta: How come? Santa: When God was giving out chins I thought he said Gin So I said I ll have a double

If something bad happens you drink in an attempt to forget; If something good happens you drink in order to celebrate; And if nothing happens you drink to make something happen

Dear Weather I am not really worried about wearing Sweater or T-shirt my concern is whether to buy Rum or Beer So please clear this confusion by sticking either to cold or hot

Beauty of Vodka: It looks like water Beauty of School: Water bottles are allowed Irony of Life: We didn t realize this in our school days Anyways enjoy it now It s never too late

Do not let a bottle of wine serve as an inspiration to call your ex in a pathetic attempt to get back together Some very fine grapes have died in the making of this wine Show some respect

Teachers are pure water; Parents are holy water; Enemies are salt water; Lovers are hot water; Spouses are cold water; But friends are liquor bottle They re always around may it be happiness or sadness

BKS Iyenger a world renowned Yoga exponent died yesterday at the age of 94 Khushwant Singh a great lover of Scotch who enjoyed his drinks daily died a couple of months back at the age of 99 Bottom line is that Whisky gives you that edge of 5 years

Bhai Log - I have serious concerns: When good happens I drink to celebrate When bad happens I drink to forget When nothing happens I drink so that something does happen I can t go on like this People have started calling me Alcoholic This is a very serious problem and needs our urgent attention Let s meet over drinks tomorrow and talk about it

Tips for women who love to cook: While seasoning if you put few drops of whiskey the oil doesn t burn While kneading dough put a few drops of beer and the chapatis will be golden brown If you add a few drops of vodka in Daal it will not spoil in summer time While making Kadhi if you add a few drops of brandy the buttermilk will not be sour and Kadhi will taste sweet Putting red wine in Rasam will enhance the taste If you can t manage the above pour 2 pegs in your husband s stomach then it doesn t matter how the food tastes