Security Manager is a person that creates a policy requiring appropriate firewall, anti-virus andIDS controls be implemented prior to any new procreation process being initiated in the company.

At a multiplex: Customer: One veg burger please Attendant: Sir do you want me to vomit? Customer: What? Attendant: Shall I vomit Sir? 6 seconds of long pause Customer: Oh ya ya please warm it

He+She= love.he+she+love= marriage.he+she+love+marriage= child.he+she+love+marriage+child= family.ANDhe+she+love+mar.+child+family= Problem.So my dear friendEAST OR WESTSINGLE LIFE IS THE BEST.

The original host for Man Vs Wild was Rajnikant, but then the people at Discovery Channel dropped the idea..why?....They didnt want children to think that eating volcanic Lava is good for health

I can lose5 letter word‘Money’4 letter word‘Food’3 letter word‘Joy’2 letter word‘Me’But I can’t loseONE letter wordThat’s“U”

The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status, or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we all believe that we are above-average drivers.

A man was taking an examination for a car driving license and one of the question asked was: What would you do if the driver of a car ahead moved arm up and down? Man or woman? asked the applicant

How could a mere tap on the shoulder startle you so? demanded the customer angrily I am sorry replied the taxi driver I have recently started driving a taxi For years I used to drive a funeral van

Lady 1: I suppose you carry a memento of some sort in that locket of yours? Lady 2: Yes it is a lock of my husband s hair Lady 1: But your husband is still alive? Lady 2: Yes but his hair are gone

At a railway station a beggar meets another beggar while a software engineer meets another software engineer Both of them ask the same question to each other `So which platform are you working on?`

There was a man who never romped or played He never smoked or drank nor kissed a girl And he passed away insurance was denied Since he had never lived they claimed he never died So live it up CHEERS

Brucelee’s Favourites:Favourite Vegetable: Mu-Lee.Favourite Breakfast: Id-Lee.Favourite Animal: Bilee,Favourite Actor: Chame-Lee.Favourite Music: Qawwa-Lee,Favourite Timepaas: Khuj-Lee…

Little Johnnie (running home): Oh mother there s going to be trouble down at the grocer s Mother: Why? Johnnie: Mrs Jones has a baby girl and Mr Jones had a sign in his window for a week Boy Wanted

A doctor implanted a new ear in a patient Man: Wat u did 2 me you gave me a woman`s ear Doctor: It makes no difference both r d same Man: No it does Now I can hear everything but understand nothing

A man walked into a florist s and said I d like some flowers please Certainly sir What did you have in mind? Man: I m not sure Perhaps I could help suggested the florist What exactly have you done?