Marriage is very much like a violin After the sweet music is over the strings are attached

Before marriage it s called DATING; And after marriage it s called as AccommoDATING

I m not saying my wife s voice is annoying but right now I m really jealous of deaf people

If you re wrong and you shut up you re wise If you re right and you shut up you re married

Optimist: He is a man who waits in his car with engine running while his wife goes shopping

Men who don t understand women at all by large fall into two groups: Bachelors and Husbands

Marriage is an occasion when a ring is put on a woman s finger and two under the man s eyes

You don t need to say anything to argue with your wife she can even argue with your silence

It s tough to stay married My wife kisses the dog on the lips but won t drink from my glass

After years of threatening to leave last night my wife finally broke my heart She s staying

Does anybody have an Owner s Manual for Wives? Mine s making a terrible loud whinning noise

Hey kids Don t bother getting married just find a woman you don t like and give her a house

I m not saying my wife s voice is annoying; But right now I m really jealous of deaf people

I used to think that I wasn t scared of anything until I saw my wife reversing my new ca

The Nigella Limit: The maximum duration of time a husband can put up with wife s bad cooking